Do You Support Pedophiles?

As of March 1st minimum wage has gone up from $7.55 to $7.95. A raise that the Saskatchewan government claims "...helps minimum wage earners build better futures by providing them a greater share in the growing economy they have helped to build."

Most people see minimum wage increases as a positive thing, more money for those who don't have the luxury of having a high-paying and sucure job. I, for one say fuck them, and fuck minimum wage increases.

Whenever the government jacks up minimum wage, they are giving lots of hard working individuals a swift kick right in thier already broken balls. I'm talking about any person who's been able to hold a shitty job for more than a year, and actually earns thier own pay increases through hard work, dedication, and amazing ability to tough it out as they get fucked each day they go to work.

When they increase minimum wage, they are basically giving anyone who's making slightly more than minimum wage a pay cut, because in most circumstances the company that they work for won't raise thier pay in relation to minimum wage. So when people who make a dollar more than new employees suddenly only makes 60 cents more thier balls get broken.

Let's take a look at people who make minimum wage, and we'll see why they don't deserve to make more money.

Highschool Students: All this extra money is only going to make highschool kids drive nicer, more reliable cars than me, and pimp them out with abnoxious stereos that will blast shitty g-unit music beside me at red lights while they do a faggy white guy gansta lean as they think to them selves "I'm so deadly, check me out."

University Students: Technically they don't even have to work, they get money and credit cards given to them no questions asked, and when they have family members that they can still mooch off of, then they are living an easy life of going on road trips and always having money for booze. I think $7.55 is more than sufficient for all those lazy hippies and ultimate frizbee playing douchebags.

Retired Bitches At Mcdonalds That Chase You Down For Stealing A Tray: I mean really? did she think that saving that tray was gunna get her bumped up to supervisor or something? Anyway, the elderly only work because they are bored, when I'm bored I watch TV, play video games and masturbate, but you don't see anyone paying me $7.95 for doing it. I'd say we should just kill them all, but if I want a BigMac before highschool kids get out of school and drive thier lazy asses to work in thier fancy new 2004 car, I'd totally be fucked.

Waitresses: An average cook is making about 10 bucks an hour (tip-out included) and waitresses are now making damn near 8, cooks work much harder than waitresses (usually because of a waitress's extreme incompetence) but waitresses do have to deal with shitty customers, seems fair right? But, even the stupidest, ugliest, fattest 15 year waitress on her very first day of work will make more than $16 in an 8 hour shift. In fact it'll probably be about $60-100. Most waitresses don't have use thier regular pay for anything including: rent, bills, car payments, drinking, drugs, fake tits, tampons, baking and cleaning supplies and the pill. So after a year of full-time waitressing they usually have a bank account sitting pretty at about 15 grand... mine is sitting pretty at about $200 right before a paycheck, as a cook you can understand why I kind of want to kill people.

Dishwashers: Typically dishwashers fall into the highschool category... cept they are usually bigger fuck-ups than your usual highschool kid and is either an E-tard, or a drunk, who will of course spend all that money on drugs, and getting drunk before work doing a hit and run... then ultimately getting fired. But thats niether here or there. The other half of dishwashers are people who are just plain slow, and are usually porn addicts or pedophiles. Here are some actual testimonials about a dishwasher I know.

"He just said that 'If I we're 20 years younger I would totally date you waitresses, you're all so fucking cute.'" -Lauren

"If you take out all of the if's and or's he's basically saying that he wants to fuck 17 year old girls." -Myself

"We should probably be alerting authorities about this... cept it's kind of funny." -Josh

"As a father of a young daughter it frieghtens me that there are people like that out there." -Tim
"I never thought my biggest fear in life would be getting raped by a 48 year old man." -Conner (male cook that was offered a place to live and a phone number... like Josh said, it's kind of funny)

"I've had to tell cooks to quit hitting on the girls, but I've never had to tell a male dishwasher to stop hitting on the guys before." -Sean (manager)

"Can't you fire him for making us feel uncomphortable all the time?" -Jess

Giving this man more money will only make it so he can afford a better computer to try and find more woman over the internet. He told us that he was going to meet one of these women... one with 2 kids... What kind of lies does this man tell these women (or men or boys I believe he may be the head of the saskatoon chapter of Nambla) He probably tells them things like "I'm totally not a 48 year old, balding, mentally challenged dishwasher at grainfields... oh and I totally don't wanna have sex with your children." I for one do not support these people, and if you support minimum wage increases, you are basically placing a naked young child in front of a pedophile with a boner.

Loser Vs. Loser counter-commentary, Joel:

Well, my work, which is a bunch of cheap motherfuckers who are assholes and treat the staff like shit (i.e. selling the staff parking lot so we don't have a place to park, and not letting us having screenings until after may, when all the badass movies are gone, etc.) are fighting head-office so we can get a .40 cent raise to co-incide with the minimum wage hike. Its always confused me why there isn't a mandatory raise with minimum wage increases, but the Saskatchewan government has a long history of being idiots.

I concur with 85% of the people at work not deserving a pay increase. In fact, i can't believe we pay them. I sort of figured it was some community retard-outreach or getting prostitutes real jobs sort of thing. Apparently not.

I basically fill all the critera for Jay to hate me, except i have no car because my stupid asshole dad sold it, so all the highschool kids there have nicer cars then me. I don't have a student line of credit and my parents don't buy me shit. Basically God hates me and takes it out on me by doing subversive evil shit. Except for this .40 raise. Fuck you God.