Hello World... Warning, long fucking post!

Well this is Jay blogging, and I know that there is a very big chance that noone will read this, but, I'm bored, so I'm going to tell you a little story, and I can see this spawning more stories in the future. The other stories may not always be true, but this one is a true story.



As you may or may not know (you of course being a people that may not actually exist and this could quite possible be a tree falling in a forest) I decided that it was time that I got out of this shit-hole city and go for a short little trip to clear my mind and to escape the desolate depressing drama filled place that we all once called home at one point or another. My sisters have been nagging me for years to visit them in Vancouver, and seeing as it was a free place to stay, with free meals, and most importantly somewhere that wasn't Saskatoon, I figured that would be an ideal destination for myself. Unfortunately I couldn't go during the weekend because of my shitty job which I hate. I went alone, and I don't think I'd wanna go to a club or something on the weekend where I'm gunna try and get laid while I'm stayin with my sisters anyway, thats just weird.



I'm sure many of you have taken a trip out west and have seen Vancouver, but I feel I need to point out the things that I noticed were different than Saskatoon while I was there. First and foremost were the leaves... I couldn't stop looking at them, for one they were still on the trees, ours were falling off at the end of august and the trees are now completely bare and everything is grey and depressing. In Vancouver they have just started to fall off, and all the leaves have brilliant color, I've never seen our leaves turn such a bright color red before here. Also the leaves were huge!!! All of them seemed to be pumped with steriods, yet the trees wern't any bigger than they are here, must be all the rain, they were the size of my face, everyday when I walked to whatever my destination was (I walked alot, which I like) I saw this one maple leaf that was especially large near my sisters apartment, and everyday I admired it's size, and it was my favorite leaf. The last thing I noticed about the leaves is that since it rained so much the leaves would fall then get soaked into the cement on the sidewalks, then the wind or someone sweeping would move them and the would leave an imprint and then a streak following behind it, as if someone was drawing a picture of a leaf blowing so it had a streak following the leaf... cept the imprint of the leaf was the starting point, instead of the finishing point... Think about it and it'll make sense.



Second was the people. My boss calls Vancouver; Hongcouver, and I understand it now, there are simply alot of asians, which isn't a bad thing, just different than our mostly white Saskatoon. The people there all need to relax. People don't stand on escalators, they walk, because that .08 minutes they save not relaxing pays off by them cramming into the first skytrain to get home, rather than waiting an extra 5 minutes for the next one. Since everyone walks where they need to be they seem to be less fat, but the women are less attractive... that is to say that the women I saw in Vancouver were less attractive, I may have somehow avoided the attractive populace because I didn't steer too far away from downtown the whole trip, but I definitly was disappointed... Also everyone seemed to be at least 35 years old... but apparently there were lots of people my age walking around, I'm just delusional and think I'm much younger than I actually am, and people my age much older... I never got ID'd anywhere I went... so maybe I am am old now and I do look like I'm 35 (like I see people in my mind) Every place I drank at had some sort of pale ale on special, so thats all I drank, liquor stores that are all privately owned didn't have GW products, I'm glad to be drinking some right now.



The third thing I noticed were the homeless. Much different than our homeless, I never feel the need to give our homeless money, because they are assholes. If I were homeless I probably wouldn't be pleasant, but vancouver's homeless kind of were. They seem to really appreciate some spare change, and have a somewhat of a sunny disposition, which makes me actually want to help out more. A clever sign is always appreciated too, my favorite one being "$1.26 short of taking over the world" (I gave him $1.50... good luck my friend, good luck.) They also have some pretty rad shopping cart homes, and random tents in random places. This is when I discovered that although I like pictures, I hate taking them, I hate being the guy with a camera taking pictures of things, I'm not sure why; I don't hate that guy, I just hate being that guy. Anyway, if I actually were to use the camera I brought with me I would have taken a series of pictures that I would call "home sweet home" and it would be of all the places homeless people live. I wouldn't have any kind of agenda with it, cause I didn't really feel sorry for them, nor did I think it was funny, I just found it interesting.



Theres many more things that I noticed like; the mountains, the size and volume of major retail stores in compairison to ours (thiers are huge, and I think I saw like 6 different 'claires' that were all huge... why?) cross walk buttons that actually served a purpose, one way streets and general the up-our-own-assness that everyone had even though they most likely came from the same place that we did, they just feel they are more cultured so they walk with thier noses in the air, what happened to being depressed all the time? But I won't get into detail, cause I've already told to what I've noticed the most, and we're quite deep into this blog and I have yet to start telling you a story. A story that won't be read anyway.



I went to vancouver because the combination of my shitty job, the fact that I hadn't left the city in over a year, I'm 22 and I live with my mom, some personal lame stuff and I really wanted to get bitten by the travel bug, and I definitly got bit by the travel bug.



I could go into detail about work, but I'm sure you all know why I hate it, so I'll leave that one alone.



Leaving the city in over a year also has to do with my job. I left the city once this year to visit my grandma in Rose Valley... which is another story in itself... actually I think I'll tell you that one later. But aside from visiting ol' granny (perhaps for the last time) I havn't even gone to a lake or anything, and thats just depressing, fuck Grainfields.



Apparently I'm a mommas boy, actually I know I am, but thats cause my mom is cool. You can ask people, apparently I talk about my mom alot, so I'm gunna try and not to anymore... even though girls have said it's cute, but you know that they think I'm a total loser. At 18 I got the boot from the house and lived with no parents for 3 years, then I got forced to move back in with my mom, and it drives me crazy, because that woman is fucking crazy, she's a 15 year old girl trapped in a 48 year old body (she's actually older, but she looks young,) everyday I get to hear about her relationship problems (with a 49 year old man that doesn't know her actual age)and how much she hates her job, although I know she's much happier working than not working, she just likes to bitch... or maybe just talk, but it's always bitching. I was free for years, and I need to be free again. It's alot easier having girls over when they know you don't live with your mom.



Lame personal stuff of course has to do with women, because I am terrible with women and the sweet kiss of happiness is always cut short when women find out that I'm actually not the badass tattooed rockstar they dream about, instead more of a pussy mommas boy with no money, a shitty car and really no life. Perhaps women just feel like slumming it, then once they get they're fill of rebellion towards thier parents or whatever they go on with thier lives, always regretting. Which would suit me just fine if I were some sort of man-slut, but I'm not, cause I only fall for girls who don't put out, which would be fine too, but the reality of the situation is that I really just wanna eat pussy.



I was definitly bit by the travel bug though. The idea was first put in my head by; suprize suprize, a woman, whom I happened to be crazy about, who happened to stop talking to me, and who happened to be planning a trip to leave for a long time. I suppose her not going being here made the sting of rejection hurt a bit less, but it got me thinking that I wanna go on a trip of my own. I wanna see Europe, I wanna go to penny lane, and I wanna have a cheesey picture of myself on Abbey road. Stay in hostels, get drunk with the irish, smoke weed for the first time in amsterdam and visit my mothers side of the family for the first time. Maybe I wanna see Europe because the girl who decided to become a bitch (but I do not hate her because I promised I wouldn't, and I'm trying to keep the promises that I make) wanted to see Ireland, but her long trip is to New Zealand cause her friends wanted to go there, and maybe I only wanna go on a trip to give a big fuck you to her and send pictures of me kissing the blarney stone in vain. And for an extra fuck you I might go up with her best friend, cause she also has interest in seeing Europe... Not to mention her friend is also gorgeous cause the third huge fuck you would be having sex with her. I figure being in Europe it would be easier to get a chick in the sack if they were all drunk off the romance of being drunk in france off of wine that came from a dispenser like a pop machine in a 7-11.



I would get to see Europe, not work, make that bitch feel like a bitch, and eat pussy... I would be happy. While I was In Vancouver, I came up with a brilliant idea to become happy.



Also I decided when I was in Vancouver that I want to write a book. A book about me, a book about my fucked up family whom I love in every way. I think enough shit has happened that not having it down in writing would be fucked. I know I havn't done the school thing, and I know I'm not a great writer, but I think I can fake it enough to make it decent. Also I've started reading alot of books (which might be why I want to do this now, but whatever) and the stuff I've read has never seemed like it was that hard to write, they just had a good story to write about, and I think I have a good story to write about.



In reality I will probably never write this book, but right now I need something that will make it so I'm not constantly thinking about how much my life sucks. And I don't do anything, One can only watch the same South Park episodes over and over again for so long.



Turns out that really wasn't much of a story as a weird ramble, but hey, fuck it.

Jay.